Corrupt a Wish

[Michael]

I wish the polar bears didn't blame me for global warming

Granted. Instead, the all powerful ALGORE blames you for global warming






I wish to make a profit

[AARR]

I wish to make a profit

Granted, but the Genie wasn't sure which profit / prophet you meant so you get both



I wish to learn to play the guitar and get my money for nothing and my chicks for free

[Michael]

I wish to learn to play the guitar and get my money for nothing and my chicks for free

Granted and you are pretty good but you still can't make a living off it. You occasionally get some money for nothing and you once got a Chik Fil A for free




I wish for those most expensive bottle of water in the world

[AARR]

I wish for those most expensive bottle of water in the world

Granted, because in the desert you'll pay anything



I wish to find out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop

[Michael]

I wish to find out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop

Granted, You spend your life searching for meaning only to find none






I wish winter was over

[AARR]

I wish winter was over

Granted, it goes from winter to Tornado season. Here's a few tips



I wish to sleep for one more hour

[Michael]

I wish to sleep for one more hour

Granted. But you miss that moment when Mrs AARR wants to get frisky



I wish for less talk and more action

[AARR]

I wish for less talk and more action

Granted,



I wish to be awake when Mrs AARR is ready for romance

[Michael]

I wish to be awake when Mrs AARR is ready for romance

Granted. But you are also stranded on the other side of the country too







I wish to motivate my kids to exercise more

[AARR]

I wish to motivate my kids to exercise more

Granted, but everyone still knows mom is boss...



I wish to be awake and in the same room when Mrs AARR is ready for romance

[Michael]

I wish to be awake and in the same room when Mrs AARR is ready for romance

Granted. But it is Ryan Gosling that she is ready for romance with

But she settles for you




I wish Mrs Michael was half as awesome as she thinks she is

[AARR]

I wish Mrs Michael was half as awesome as she thinks she is

Granted, but when you say you want to be treated like a king she puts you in your place like a boss



I wish Mrs AARR would stop looking at Ryan, only look at me, be in the same room while I'm awake, and be frisky (did I cover everything, yet?)

[Michael]

I wish Mrs AARR would stop looking at Ryan, only look at me, be in the same room while I'm awake, and be frisky (did I cover everything, yet?)

Granted. But the whole affair is over with in less than a minute which upsets Mrs AARR






I wish to be on time

[AARR]

I wish to be on time

Granted, but it's bad timing



I wish to reach for the stars

[Michael]

I wish to reach for the stars

Granted. But it lands you in jail




I wish for the real deal

[AARR]

I wish for the real deal

Granted, South Park was right



I wish for a do over

[Michael]

I wish for a do over

Granted.......But you make all the same mistakes over again






I wish to open a pizzeria

[AARR]

I wish to open a pizzeria

Granted, but you are sued for false advertising



I wish to eat a Michael's pizza

[Michael]

I wish to eat at Michael's pizza

Granted. But you play a game of Pizza Roulette

and you pay dearly




I wish to clear my plate

[AARR]

I wish to clear my plate

Granted, but you wonder who ate your last four fries

It was me


I wish to reboot